this is NOT how it was supposed to work out.
we were supposed to end up together and i’d go to college and we’d end up together then and i’d essentially live with you and i’m getting so far ahead of myself but that just made sense. duh. and we’d go on with our schooling and just it would work out. and it’s my fault your fault doesn’t even matter because what matters is this is where we find ourselves. queee ladiilla. otra vez. y me pega mas que nunca like three weeks later i’m still struggling.
it’s so much easier to keep on going without stopping and pretending to be okay than it is to have to look at yourself in the mirror and say no. i’m not. i need to work shit out. i’m at a nice halfway point.
someone retweeteed something about if you get a second chance don’t waste it and i wouldnt retweet that because you know it’d be about you because idk. there’s unfortunately a chance limit. i didn’t think i’d say that. at least in exactly a weeeeek i’ll be flying to a place really really far away and getting away for a month and i feel like it’s just gonna be so different and exciting.
but at the same time i believe this sucks and then i get sad and i want to give you a hug and last weekend i couldn’t even fall asleep by myself instead i had to go sleep with isa porque simplemente no podia dormir porque no tenia sueno y entraba luz y tu me hacias falta. this is the longest i’ve ever been completely single zero attachment in years. daaaamn. boo.
to do: get back in shape.
i might still be at my normal weight but i am so out of shape.
now that ap’s are done i have absolutely no excuse.
